This Asshole Should Be Court-Martialed

Okay seriously…what…the…fuck.

Time to bitch.

I am so sick and tired of these un-american, bitter, racist, arrogant fucks trying to bring up a lawsuit to get Obama pulled out of office every two months. It’s getting to the point of being ludicrous now, and the fact of the matter is…it’s been proven beyond a shadow of a doubt (by people who have both handled, touched, taken pictures of and verified Obama’s birth certificate with their own hands) that Obama was born in Hawaii and is a national born citizen. It doesn’t matter how much proof comes out to prove their claims wrong, they absolutely refuse to accept that Obama is president.

It has nothing to do with protecting our constitution, nothing to do with liberty…it has to do with a partial African-American finally holding the highest office in this nation, and ignorant old hicks (who are still trapped in the 1960s) being unable to let go of their racist and out of date beliefs.

To the man who appears in that video? Fuck you. If you don’t want to support our country and our president, get the fuck out of this country. To not support your commander in chief due to your own personal beliefs (and not due to actual fact) is un-american and I hope you wind up scrubbing floors in a day care center for the rest of your life you un-patroitic dick.

*Breathes* That felt good.

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The Best Spam Email Ever

This email takes me on a magical journey, into the land of acid trips and potent LSD:

“If I can see Mr. What is it then? He’s about done the job now. But who has done this? My head is clear. Why this joy? And yet she was very handsome. What year would it be? You told us to obey her.We should be quite a family party. God bless you and guard you! That is glorious! But she was young and innocent. She was startled. It’s part of being a feeling creature. Wee-Nii waved his hand. It did not move any more. That was a blessing. There was nothing to do but wait. Tompetch watched the panorama screen.”

I wonder if by wee-nii……..they mean my penis. Yes my penis has hands.

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Why Are Critics Such Pansies? My Review of Law Abiding Citizen

“Clyde Shelton is an upstanding family man whose wife and daughter are brutally murdered during a home invasion. When the killers are caught, Nick Rice, a hotshot young Philadelphia prosecutor, is assigned to the case. Over his objections, Nick is forced by his boss to offer one of the suspects a light sentence in exchange for testifying against his accomplice. Fast forward ten years. The man who got away with murder is found dead and Clyde Shelton coolly admits his guilt. Then he issues a warning to Nick: Either fix the flawed justice system that failed his family, or key players in the trial will die. Soon Shelton follows through on his threats, orchestrating from his jail cell a string of spectacularly diabolical assassinations that can be neither predicted nor prevented. Philadelphia is gripped with fear as Shelton’s high-profile targets are slain one after another and the authorities are powerless to halt his reign of terror. Only Nick can stop the killing, and to do so he must outwit this brilliant sociopath in a harrowing contest of wills in which even the smallest misstep means death. With his own family now in Shelton’s crosshairs, Nick finds himself in a desperate race against time facing a deadly adversary who seems always to be one step ahead.”

Here we are with another example that proves that movie critics suck, and know absolutely jack in regards to what makes a movie good or enjoyable. I present to you:  my review of Law Abiding Citizen.

Critically panned at the box office, Law Abiding Citizen is a highly intelligent and well thought out psychological thriller that involves Clyde Shelton, a father who feels the justice system has failed him after one of his family’s killers go free due to the workings of the American Justice System. Feeling the penalty enforced is not enough, Clyde decides to take matters into his own hands and enacts a brutal (and deadly) plan to fix the broken justice system from the bottom up.

All I can say is: Wow. The critics really missed the boat on this one. While I’ll admit the whole entire premise of the movie is a little far fetched (hey that’s Hollywood for you), the movie itself was very well written and features enough twists and turns to keep you guessing and never able to truly predict the way the movie pans out. Infact, at one scene (which I will not spoil here), there is a scare that comes out of nowhere, and is so violent that it shocked every one around me (including myself) enough to pause the movie so we could take a breath. Yes the movie is that quick on it’s toes, and if you’re not a fan of the fast paced blood/gore/violence genre than I’d recommend turning down this flick because it is not for the faint of heart.

Which is why I must ask: Why are critics such pansies? If a movie has a lot of violence or gore in it, they automatically dismiss it as “torture-porn” or “unnecessarily violent”, claiming the movie is poor because of it. Not true. While I’m aware in today’s politically correct society that an over the top movie like Law Abiding Citizen might not be welcome, not everybody wants an over-sanitized, dishonest cop thriller/comedy force-fed down their throats every five months. No, some people want gritty and dark and honest movies, and that is what Law Abiding Citizen has to offer. It is one of those violent movies with a moral compass, that makes you question truly who’s side you are on and if the “good guys” are really such good guys after all.

Definitely a better movie than the ignorant critics put it as, and I’d recommend it highly.

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I Can’t Think Of A Title :P.

So I’ve been having a very good week and a half. Despite not being selected for a job position that I was applying for, the compliments given to me in my ‘rejection interview’ as well as the recent opportunities I’ve been given [possibly as a result of that interview] are really exciting. As this is my personal blog (and in the sake of professionalism I’d like to keep it that way) I naturally cannot say who I work for, what I do, or even go into more detail about why my week is so great…however; I will say that it feels as if things may finally be falling into place. I love my job, and to be in one place for so long (4 years!!) is a wonderful feeling.

Aside from that, I have a lot of things I need to take care of this week and over the next few months. For starters, my Jeep is going to be heading into the shop soon to figure out why the headlights keep flickering on and off and why the car will suddenly just lose power and shut off out of nowhere. At first it seemed like it was a battery issue, but buying a new battery hasn’t stopped this from happening so it’s off to the repair shop we go. Could be the car’s inner computer, or a loose wire, but whatever it is hopefully it doesn’t cost too much, because with my bills and everything else…the last thing I need is more debt.

I also need to figure out what I’m going to do for the new Linkinpark.com contest. I should definitely enter it, but I wonder how I should present myself. Hmmm…

And by the way, why is “I Kissed A Girl” in a Victoria’s Secret commercial? O_o

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Australia: The Best World War 2 Movie That You’ve Probably Never Seen

Hollywood: Why cant we make movies like this anymore?

Released in 2008, (and directed by Moulin Rouge! director Baz Luhrmann) Australia is a beautiful film that somehow managed to slip under the public radar, and despite it’s high production values (130 million) never really got the respect [nor the attention] it deserved.

And what a shame that is because this movie is extraordinary. Combining a war movie with the western, romance, comedy and drama genres effortlessly, this movie is the closest Hollywood has come to a ‘Golden Age’ quality movie in decades.  While some parts are predictable and easy to read, what makes this movie something special is that it never tries to be something that it’s not. Rather than resort to explicit sex, scenes of nudity, or graphic violence to win viewers..Australia is a wholesome, honest tale about corruption and prejudice during World War 2, that begins in 1939 and ends shortly after the Japanese bombing of Darwin in 1942. Because of the time period in which the movie takes place, allusions are made to important historical and cultural events of the time, including the attack on Pearl Harbor and even the release of The Wizard of Oz.

Infact, Oz fans may be surprised to find out that The Wizard of Oz plays a large part in telling the story behind Australia, as the film’s uplifting story about following your dreams, and traveling “over the rainbow” serve as an inspiration to Nullah, a mixed-race aboriginal boy who faces hardship and intense racism brought on by his heritage and ethnic background. Nullah is instantly captivated by “Over The Rainbow” and hints of the song can be heard throughout the movie’s 2 hour and 45 minute span, serving as a (at times) tear jerking nod towards Nullah’s ambitious dreams of one day being a man and following in the footsteps of his grandfather “King George”. The casting of a REAL Aborigine by Luhrmann was a genius move, and lends a feeling of authenticity to the overall story. While many directors would’ve cast a mixed-race boy from America, and taught him an Australian accent, Baz Luhrmann went the extra step in shooting on location/casting real Aborigines and the results pay off.

It is these little touches, and the wonderful script writing by Baz Luhrmann, Ronald Harwood, Stuart Beattie and Richard Flanagan that really makes this movie what it is. I could go on forever, and make an even longer review of this movie, but instead I will simply recommend that you watch this movie as soon as possible. While some modern audiences will dislike the movie’s serious tone and almost 3 hour run time, those who appreciate a well told story, and beautiful imagery will likely find this movie to be one of the most underrated and well done romance epics of 2008.

Plot Summary:

“Set in Australia on the brink of World War II, Lady Sarah Ashley, an English Aristocrat (Kidman), travels to the faraway continent where she has inherited a cattle ranch, owned by her late husband. When Australian cattle barons plot to take her land, she reluctantly joins forces with a rough-hewn local known as The Drover (Jackman) to drive 2,000 head of cattle across hundreds of miles of the country’s most unforgiving land, only to still face the bombing of Darwin by the Japanese forces that had attacked Pearl Harbor. When tragedy strikes and Lady Sarah becomes unofficial guardian to a “half-caste” boy, the unlikely couple must come to terms with a prejudiced society, dishonorable business associates and the impending arrival of the Japanese.”

Screenshots:

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And now for something completely different.

So here I am with my first post, on my brand new blog…hosted graciously through WordPress Blogs (but maybe someday through my official domain: derekoswald.com).

In looking at this blog you are probably wondering why I have created a new blog [when I could have just used Silent Hope]. Good question.

The truth is, as much as Silent Hope will always be my “home” on the World Wide Web…for the past few months I have been at a crossroads as to where to take the whole “Silent Hope” idea from here. The current version of the site is just far too ambitious and impossible to keep updated frequently with new content. It’s a case of ambition vs. reality/adult life, and the latter is kicking my ass. I just don’t have the time anymore.

As it has been with the other versions that came before, I have found myself second guessing the “ideas” I had for the site, as well as grappling with the idea of redo-ing everything from scratch. This wouldn’t be the first time I’ve thought of this [much to the chagrin of my friend Keaton], and I’m sure it’s not going to be the last.

Right now I can either have this blog be stand alone…or I can integrate this idea into an all new Silent Hope, taking the entire site in a more minimalist direction and having everything be more focused on a blog, then a site full of content.  The latter seems like the route I may one day eventually take, but ideally I wouldn’t like to have to redo Silent Hope all over again…so for now the two sites will be separate.

Where it goes beyond that is anybody’s guess…but for now, stay tuned. This could be big..“Nudge, nudge, wink, wink. Know what I mean?”

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